He Said...
78 days, 9 hours, 5 minutes and 6 seconds
Or 2 months, 16 days, 9 hours, 5 minutes, 6 seconds
6,771,906 seconds
112,865 minutes
1881 hours
11 weeks
Included in that time is;
The few seconds it took for us to meet outside a theatre in Logan on 7/7/7, and for me to act completely nervous and awkward, (otherwise known as typical Ben to those who know me well).
The single weekend it took for me to wear a dress to impress a girl at a birthday party, and to finish falling in love with someone I only just met that day. (Don't ask me how wearing a dress impresses a girl)
The weeks that followed that proved to me that she is everything I ever wanted.
The excruciatingly long time it took for me to finally get down to meet her parents and ask her father, (who by the way is an avid hunter), for permission to marry her.
The most fun I have ever had on a road trip. (including the wild boar we ran over in the dessert)
The time it took for me to ask her the question that I wanted to ask after only two weeks of knowing her.
And most importantly the word Yes that followed.
After approximately 78 days on September 23rd 2007 I am officially engaged to Cassandra Orr.
I love you Cassandra, you mean more to me than anything in this world, I have loved you since we met, and I will always love you.
She Said...
An independent woman, I've always thought, was a necessary thing. A necessary thing for me that is. And in thinking this I was certain that I doomed myself to a fate of loneliness and ignorance of such. Who could possibly love a woman with such a loud mouth and slightly (understatement) overbearing personality?
Turns out I know someone who can. He seems to think it's fun.
It's strange how it feels as if I'm missing a part of me that is currently somewhere near Salt Lake. Surprisingly enough I' not referring to the several pounds of breast tissue I left in a HazMat receptacle at McKay Dee Hospital four short weeks ago (classy mention I know) but instead I speak of the 6'4" blond hair, blue eyed, perfectly chiseled masculine masterpiece of a man who has the power to melt me with a look, a kiss, a touch, and the ability to take my heart off my sleeve and hold it in his strong and capable hands. He takes care of me when I'm broken or sick, thinks I'm beautiful even when I'm swollen and scarred, constantly impresses me with his knowledge and ability to teach, looks great in everything from a tux to a dress (long story) to the real Levi jeans he wore on the ranch to meet my family, and always makes sure I know how much I am loved.
I call him mine.
And as of this past Sunday night I also call him my fiancée. Yes people, the rumors are wonderfully true! I'm going to marry the man of my dreams and I can honestly say that beside him I make sense.
Knowing that someday I'd amount to something big ( a great writer, great actress, great inspirer, great novice, great grandmother, etc.) I'd always focused my goals on doing things to get me there and usually that required solitary independence. And yet, in the past three days the only thing I seem to be accomplishing is the fact that I am a great emoter. I can quite magnificently emote.
In fact it seems that I've been crying for days. Not tears of sorrow mind you but the kind that fill your eyes and sit there peacefully on your lids until you smile wide enough for them to race down your cheeks, the kind of tears that cover your contacts in such a thick layer of salt that you can't see to drive home, the kind of tears that multiply each time you even think a loving thought, the kind of tears that arrive only when you are wonderfully, surprisingly, and indescribably happy.
So here I sit atop my big squishy bed alone (mind the dog), covered in tears (obviously), and not even attempting to wipe this giddy grin off my face as I switch my bedside lamp on and off repeatedly just so I can look at my newly acquired piece of jewelry in every light and I can't help thinking that it's wonderful being such an independent woman in love with an independent man who makes me the happiest woman on earth.
So here we are: short courtship, long engagement, followed by the wedding of the year and the kind of life they write books about. In fact maybe someday I will.
Benjamin Gordon Coulam I love you today, tomorrow, and everyday of the rest of our lives!
